Tag: how to

How To, humor, self-help

A Shed, Some Bread, & A Dog… Oh My!

Rita Slanina

It’s summer and it’s diy time! Today we tackle a shed, some bread, & a dog… Oh My!

Between the extreme heat warnings, the readiness to jump out the door for poolside fun, and oh yeah! Those, oh so dire, attempts at trying to get ANY work done in the office…. An overwhelm of brain fragmenting, and seriously, my brain just keeps crossing it’s wires. Shutting off. No thoughts. No thinking. Just that ‘knock! knock! ‘No one’s home type of action. It’s too hot. I’m so sweaty. Where’s fall, already? And, I’m definitely off track. Again. So, I digress.

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  • If your projects seem to be never-ending this summer, then you are not alone! I’m rowing that same canoe.
  • If you’re one of those peeps who enjoys their summer time sans projects and good at incorporating sun rays and beach waves; good for you! I’m jelly.

And since laying around, watching the birds chirp just isn’t my thing –

– not for lack of want but bc I cannot sit still for nuthin’ – it was time to dust off the list, and check an item off the list of outdoor construction projects… the shed. This thing was just so disgusting. Termites, voles living underneath the structure, nests of other bugs within the walls, deterioration of the wood, black mold, wood rot due to improper insulation and/or the build itself not properly sealed.

Take a look at the video below to see how I de-constructed that gnarly thang! I did it fairly quickly in three stages. I started with the roof, then attacked the walls, and finally removed the foundation. The word foundation is used loosely here as it was also rotten and foul.

Maybe you’re not even a “go outdoors in the summer” kinda gal (or dude) and prefer an indoor activity? While, I have some good (indoor) stuff in store for you in upcoming posts, today’s I ventured indoors to bake some bread. It’s the easiest recipe I’ve ever used and I get perfect results every time. It’s technically a ‘french bread, high altitude’ recipe I found online; but from what I’ve heard, high altitude recipes just call for a higher heat time while baking. Let me know if this is true, and if this is the only reason that it’s high altitude! I’d love some confirmation on this!

No time to watch any videos?

Check out my free printable BREAD RECIPE CARD below and get baking right away!

CLICK RECIPE CARD TO PRINT <3
bruno taste testing fresh bread

Naturally, I had to grab my number one taste tester, Bruno! My labpei is quirky guy, with tons of personality and he is NOT shy when it comes to food. He knows what he loves, and spits out what he don’t! And, I think we can say that Bruno was definitely loving today’s loaf!

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4-hot-tips grab a blender i've got lemons rita slanina starting over create fresh start in life
Exercise, healthy and beauty, How To, humor, new years resolutions, relationships, self-help

Grab A Blender… I’ve got lemons!

Rita Slanina

Okay ya’ll! Grab your blenders… because I’ve lemons!

Er… Wrong Blenders, Love Bug

You know the saying, “When life hands you lemons… Add a spritzer!”

Okay, so no, that’s NOT how it goes… but if you stumble upon some champagne, let’s have a party! *wink

So, I was trying to figure out how to write this post. Starting over suddenly, without warning because you HAD no other options totally stinks. But, I have mulled over the details just way too much. And as much as I want to “spill the beans” on my traumatic event which got me here, I’m not even really over it enough to do so.

Ergo, in pure “Rita” fashion… I decided, to keep it light and funny. As you all know… it’s what I always do! Suppress that ish! And work through the hard shit!

Man up!

Head up!

Chin up!

Shoulders back!

Smile!

Because sometimes, life hands you lemons. So… you are forced to figure out how to create a fresh start in life. Again. You don’t see it coming. Or maybe you did. It’s like you’re watching a nightmare unfold before your eyes. And this time, it’s not Halloween. And you’re not watching a horror film. You’re living it. Or you suddenly you just needed a change. The world has gotten so freaking weird and now Florida sounds like a wonderful place to just touch ground.

So you got the lemons crapped all over you. No biggie. Make the damn lemonade!

Just kidding. I don’t know why I chose to curse!

But, not really. C’est la vie! 

I had finally found peace and solace in the mountains. Finding joy in the mundane was my motto for that chapter of my life and it was fabulous. 

I wish I could’ve kept that life forever. Enjoy the rest of my days following a simple; but amazing plan in retirement with the love of my life. But… as luck would have it, I got freakin’ screwed. Sure, I dodged some lemons for a while. But eventually, the whole tree just dumped on me. Alas, mon ami…. no boohooing. At least, not yet!

But it’s time to highlight why picking myself up off the floor – after imprinting myself on it for a while – is good news for you! *It doesn’t sound exactly like good news.

Right. Well, stick with me.

So…Why, is it good news, you ask? 

Because… eventually, I was able to at least get up off the floor. You know, after the numbness subsided, and the bedsores healed. Just kidding about the bedsores. But, not the numbness. Granted, tears were just NOT stopping but hey… you take what you can get in this game called Life CAN Suck. 

So, how do you push forward?

*Oh no.

Yup!

*No…

YUPPERS!

*Not the lists.

Yes! Yes! YES! I’ve got LISTS! Wahoo!!

If you prefer the more watching me work the list; as opposed to reading it check out this week’s video below.

Just a simple note: I DO NOT have it all figured out. But, I believe we never have it ALL FIGURED OUT. (I think I wrote a song with the same title – Ha! – add it to your playlists!)

– that which I swear by –

In the essense of humor, I do believe grabbing a blender when you have lemons is the best analogy to make smiles & hopefully inspire those who are also having entire life adjustments. Regardless, of your current situation, however dire or bleak, give these 4 Hot Tips a try. You never know what could happen!

You might invent a new margaRITA! *wink

See what I did there…

Yes, we all saw it. *slaps forehead

humor, self-help

How-To Laugh (When You’re Crying)

Rita Slanina

IMG_0167This sentiment is a testament to the “fake it til  you make it” crowd. I don’t mean ‘dress for the job you want, not the job you have’ reference. Although, that is a good one; that does fit into this category. Nonetheless, isn’t going to apply here, so toss it from your dome. Bye bye. This is for when you feel like shit and want to hide under a rock with the super size bottle of vino and a Kleenex 3-pack.

The thought occured to me when I was being suffocated, in the depths of my sofa cushions. Did I mention I finally paid it off? The pay-as-you-go couch plan is genius. Anyway, I was having a bad day -which was made worse by some conflicting persons in my circle -not their fault, they’re male- and I realized after twelve hours of uncontrollable sobbing… I needed to just, stop sobbing. Oh, and to stop letting him help. So, I came up with this nifty how-to list to help anyone else out there who’s at their wits end. With everything.

HOW-TO LAUGH (WHEN YOU’RE CRYING)

IN JUST 3 FANCY STEPS 

1. THROW OUT OLD CRAP. The most effective way for me to kick the blues is to just dump old shit that’s -proverbially & sometimes spacially- weighing me down. This means a stack of CDs you’re not listening to–WAIT. Does anyone listen to CDs anymore? Seriously, let it go. Burn it to your iLibrary and toss that plastic. Or sell it at a yard sale to a cat lady stuck in her Chumbawamba concert tee.

2. REARRANGE THE ROOM. Instead of yelling off your balcony at the dumbasses next door to you about their cigarettes and loud music because they’re interrupting your good time crying time… Consider giving your living a space a mini-makeover. Move the nightstand by the dishwasher. Put the saucepan in the closet. You know, go wild. Plus, you can make a game out of this by dragging around your bottle of fermented grapes until you’re disoriented and bumping into Kleenex boxes.

3. LAUGH ALREADY! Get silly. Start arguments with your boyfriends about pickle jars losing their oomph. Pull a prank on your bestie by telling her The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy WAS a great movie. It wasn’t. Press the point that it was nothing like the book and she’ll love it. She won’t love it and the book was better. The movie? Eh. Tell her wearing a prom dress and a tiara will make the experience much more memorable. And to selfie that mess.

IMG_7437

DISCLAIMER: Entertainment value only. But if you throw peas out a window, I’d try that too.