Category: technology

Hi guys! Today, I am going to gripe. So, buckle your seatbelts and leggo!!!!

If you have a website and you have data on that website then you are aware of the scoring system that analyzes “readability.” This is essentially the measured difference between being able to communicate to a child to a fully (college) educated adult.

I accept that this is the way SEO is somehow measured; but, I don’t freaking like it.

At all?

NOT. EVEN. A. LITTLE. BIT.

In fact? I’ve got an ax to grind here.

I f***ing HATE IT.

But, just because I hate it doesn’t mean I refuse to educate myself on it, learn how to apply it’s requirements, and ultimately implement action to help in raising the rankings for my website and it’s content. Look, I’m aware that my content is for fun and essentially “of the moment” therefore, unless updated annually, some of my stuff will just be dusty and useless. Which are some pretty strategic life goals, really.

Kidding.

I like to entertain. Maybe my words linger, maybe they don’t. Maybe I should just zip my lip in some cases; but, let’s be realistic… stop talking. It’s just not going to happen. Still talking.  I’m a chatty kathy. Knew it. A rambling woman. I don’t STFU.

So? You’re stuck with me. And the talking. 

Which means, you get to continue reading (or don’t) continue reading over this whining on the Flesch Scoring System. Boo! I know. I feel ya! Since when is it a bad thing to use words derived of a decent education? Isn’t this what we were bred to do. How about that SAT score? I guarantee you if that was online it would fail miserably too. High schoolers are on a must-know basis of bigger words that… See Spot Run. Or, Everybody Poops.

Both great books by the way.                                                  

While I adore 11 year old kids and their preciousness, the truth of the matter is… writing my blog so they can understand this would – IMO – be absurd! Very. Is the Flesch scoring system trying to assume that most adults can’t handle a word larger than four syllables? Ah, good theory. Or think in an educated manner? Duh, da, da’s. I was more befuddled by the thought that said scoring system presumes the average adult in our society reads at an 11 year old level!

But, this is also coming from a former 11 year old – me, people – that was called “four eyes” in elementary. And a “walking thesaurus” in high school. *shrugs

Not funny, homosapiens! I have feelings – sometimes – too!!

I’m glad I was picked on for my nerdiness. It gave me thick skin and a blog that some stupid scoring system fails me on.

*shaking head

A failing score for word awareness. So ass backwards.

 

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Ah, mother.

Here we go again.

This time? GPS. Across country.

I don’t know what happens when we cross the age of senior citizen status; but, I gotta tell you, I will NEVER look forward to it and when it happens, I can almost guarantee that I will be redefining that age group for myself. And if it is true, that one day we turn into our parents…? (pause, think, think)…

I’m absolutely terrified.

My mom is a sweetheart. And yet… totally nuts. She’s driving across country with a GPS system that I am pretty sure would make a better paper weight. Every few hours or so, I get a call that goes like this:

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MOM: Can you go on the internet?

ME: Why mom?

MOM: Well, the lady on my machine told me to get off this exit and then I saw a sign for       Colorado. Am I in Colorado?

ME: I don’t know where you are, mom. What highway are you on?

MOM: Well… I’m not sure. It’s just dark and I don’t remember where the turn went.

*slaps forehead – At this point, I’m pretty sure her GPS “Machine Lady” hasn’t been updated beyond the township she once lived and therefore has zero capability of actually getting her across our vast American land.

ME: Why aren’t you using your Map App on your phone? That GPS is as useful as trying to scoop sand with a fork.

MOM: Why would I scoop sand with a fork?

ME: Mom, please focus.

MOM: I don’t have a map on my phone. I don’t have a smart phone. I have a Galaxy.

ME: That’s a smart phone. Open the app on the phone.

MOM: I can’t. I would have to pull over and I don’t want to lose any more driving time.

ME: You’ve already lost drive time and your driving to  San Francisco.

MOM: I don’t want to go to San Francisco!!!

So, this could go on forever. And it did.

Trying to explain technology to a certain age group is fairly challenging. I love that my mother has taken the steps to keep up with it. But, she still has a long way to go.

Wish me luck!

As for her trip across county… She didn’t end up in the bay area; but, someone did mistake her for a prostitute at a truck stop since she was traveling alone.

I’m guessing that’s the only prerequisite to that profession.

 

 

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**If you enjoy our content you can help keep http://www.ritaslanina.com going directly by donating over at Patreon!