A.K.A.
PHASE: PLEASE SHOOT ME.
Okay, okay, let’s get to it. If you have ever tried to implement a new routine for yourself then you totally understand todays post. Now that winter is in full swing, the “new year, new me” hashtag in underway… it’s time for me to get back on that pony express and ride into the sunrise. Huh? I don’t know. But, what I do know is that getting into a new, or in this case, old routine that I had running before summer vacation is not an easy task. Blah.
I have begun by setting my alarm (AGAIN) for 4:40 AM months ago. Holy – too early – batman! I know, it’s early but it works. I don’t know why 4:40 is my time to wake but; it just is, and what’s even weirder is I usually get up before my alarm, rising to the the tune of 4:39. 4:17. Or even 3:53. It’s not natural. It’s weird. Totally. I get it, but like I said, it works for me. Cuckoo.
After I’ve set my alarm for this – godforsaken – time, I have set a series of alarms to keep my morning in check. Now, it’s a work in progress as I have been at this for a few months now since last summer’s end. It’s so easy to get sidetracked in the morning… if you allow it. You totally allow it. I totally do.
As free-spirited as I appear to be, I am actually extremely regimented and right down to the incremental minutes of my day. You’d think this would make me cranky if I don’t make a certain task or follow my alarm schedule but really I’m so much more cheerful, helpful and have more inner peace… Like, maybe that’s when my free-spirit-ness kicks in? Hmmm…. Even if I only accomplish one task, I’m cool with it. Like waking up? Yes. Like waking up. Routine is good, people.
Scheduled creativity? Yup. It’s a thing!
This morning; however, or rather the past few days, I have been rather sluggish. Non-motivated. I guess it happen to everyone. Let’s give a quick run down on my mishaps this week to put it in perspective. Let’s start with the 2-a-day’s at the gym. I’ve totally upped my game on every aspect of my life and I’m feeling the lag. I hopped on the treadmill this morning and fell off. Hold on. What?
Yup! Just, whoop…. slide. Kerplunk! Right off the back of that moving death machine. I’m 
not even sure how that happens. No one else does either. Regardless. My body must’ve been signaled from the brain that day… not today sloth. Not today.
I attempted to read my third book (Yay!) of the year and it was moving the words around on the page. Boo. Not kidding. It was messing with me. It even hid itself from me. How does a book play hide and seek? Good question! When you find out the answer, tell my lost book, it’s time to give it up and show itself.
My back-to-basics boring food hauls. Well, those are just boring. Not much to report on plain rice and egg whites. Fermented probiotic drinks. Protein bars. Vegetables. Boring. Boring. And more boring. But food is fuel… blah, blah, blah. I know.
Sitting at my desk to get work done? That kink in my neck creeps up again…. *shakes head, don’t get me started
Anyway, I think you get the idea and then, boom! The morning routine I so meticulously orchestrated has fallen to the wayside. I’m now finding myself saying, my body needs to recoup-hit the snooze button. I’ll push my appointments a couple hours-it’ll be fine. Gosh, where are my favorite high heels I like to wear? I donated them? Why the hell did I do that-I loved those things. *remembers aggressive decluttering mission of November 2018
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Damn it.
You’re rambling and way off track. I know.
Just like phase one of that morning routine.
Moving on, I’ve also washed these pleggings a couple times and I’m wondering if the shape of the pants themselves had been altered due to that. *fingers crossed, please. Please. Please. Please.
Now, I know, I know, not everyone is aspiring to get their splits mastered. Nor were they high level gymnasts. Right. But, for the few that want to attain those middle splits, I’ve created a video for you! If you don’t put in the work, time and effort… you will NEVER get your middle splits. Or any splits for that matter. With anything, you gotta make the time for it. Giraffe wrangling? Put the work in. Tippy-toe dipping? And, set some goals to help you stay motivated to achieve those goals. Even, if it’s just getting your middle splits down pat! Punny.
play school age, you’d catch me out on the playground with the kids swinging around on the monkey bars and throwing a ball around and hopping on and off curbs for that matter as well!! As soon as we stop playing, our bodies start aging at an accelerated rate. Add a dash of peer pressure and social atmosphere of friends who complain of ailments and don’t want to get off a couch… and you have a recipe for couch potato-ing with your snacks and beer for forty plus years.