Clean With Me… and My Judgmental Chickens 🐔🧹
Join me on an amusing – Clean With Me – journey as we tackle tidying up, sip on some soul-warming coffee, and track easy-win habits that’ll make Marie Kondo proud and receive tons o’ judgement from my chickiepoos!
Alos… Meet Butler Jeeves, my rebellious robot vacuum, who prefers leisurely naps over cleaning marathons these days.
Will he decide to join the cleanup crew today or find a new cozy corner to snooze in?
And in the grand escapade of the day, we’re transforming ‘The Chicken-Office-Dojo-House’ into a stylish Guantanamo Chicken Coop!
Well… sort of.
It’s time for our feathered friends to bid adieu to the husband’s office and finally settle into their coop kingdom.
Errr… maybe. ha!
Highlights Include:
- Coffee-fueled cleaning and decluttering tips
- Relatable mishaps with Butler Jeeves, the lazy robot vacuum
- Simple habit tracking for winning at life
- The hilarious saga of constructing a chicken coop
Introduction: Marvels of a Marvelous Mess
Welcome, adventurous spirits and caffeine aficionados, to another episode of my wonderfully chaotic life!
Today, we embark on an odyssey featuring coffee breaks, the mystery of Butler Jeeves—the robot vacuum with a pension-for-laziness—and the exciting escapade of rebuilding ‘The Chicken-Office-Dojo-House’ into our ultimate Guantanamo Chicken Coop.
Grab your favorite mug, stuff your pockets with courage and let’s get started!
Chapter 1: The Coffee Chronicles
Ah, the sweet aroma of freshly brewed coffee—a beacon of hope in an otherwise cluttered wilderness.
As the day began, I clung to my steaming mug like a sailor to a lighthouse.
With every sip, I was reminded that even epic cleaning quests can start with small victories.
Habit number one: coffee, and lots of it. It’s the fuel for a thousand good intentions and at least a few half-baked plans.
Mid-caffeine contemplations often conjure strange ideas; today’s was the notion of practice decluttering.
You see, tidying is more than shoving stuff into closets—it’s about releasing the spirits of past purchases and finding space for future chaos.
Chapter 2: Habit Tracking for Champions
While sipping on my elixir of life, I grabbed my trusty habit tracker—a well-loved notebook decorated with motivational quotes (mostly written in moments of delirium).
It may not look fancy, but it’s my trusty sidekick in the battle against procrastination.
Habit tracking keeps life interesting and surprisingly efficient. In my experience, there’s nothing like ticking off “morning coffee” to feel a surge of falsely inflated productivity. Simple wins create momentum, and in this book, drinking coffee counts as a major victory!
Here’s the breakdown of today’s easy wins:
- Coffee Consumption: Achieved with professional flair. Bonus points if your cup matches the couch color.
- Peekaboo Tidying: Rediscover closets by randomly opening them, gasping theatrically, and closing them again. Necessary courage counts as an achievement.
- Robot Vacuum Mastery: Convincing Butler Jeeves to leave his nap spot and actually work—wish me luck.
- Chicken Coop Daydreaming: Strategically plan which way the wind doesn’t blow for optimal chicken-based perfume control.
Chapter 3: The Butler Jeeves Saga
Butler Jeeves, my dignified but sporadically rebellious robot vacuum, has character and charm. Lately, he’s taken on a new persona—Napoleon Napper, Businessman of Breaks.
I swear he’s more interested in plotting his escape than vacuuming.
Today began like any other—bright, shiny, Jeeves in the corner pretending to absorb his charging cable. I had a quick pep talk with him, half expecting him to wink or at least beep in consent.
Alas, silence reigned.
Clearly, the romance of dust busting was no longer thrilling.
With my softest sternness, I issued Jeeves an ultimatum. “Jeeves,” I declared, “a clean house is a happy house. Off you go!” He ponderously moved, suspiciously creeping forward before embarking on his great voyage across the living room rug.
Five minutes in, folks—I find him jammed under the sofa, turning the adventure into a quest for liberation. Some might call it a conspiracy of furniture, I call it Butler Jeeves’ siesta plot.
Chapter 4: The Chicken-Office-Dojo-House Conundrum
Now, let’s talk about The Chicken-Office-Dojo-House—an experiment in cohabitating styles that did not necessarily mesh.
To give you a visual: think chicken Zen garden meets office Zen master. The chickens claimed squatter’s rights in my husband’s office, turning his work station into poultry paradise.
Unexpected clients learned to duck dive for feathers—literally.
Today’s mission—transition them from office enthusiasts to outdoor aristocrats by refurbishing our grand Guantanamo Chicken Coop. Building—a process that’s part mission impossible, part jungle gym assemble.
Our grand coop concept? Open floor plan, organically pecked décor panels, and a chic chicken run. It’s transforming from Cottagecore punk to luxury retreats designed to rival any posh suburban playground. And with the ultimate aim: making our garden less compost pile, more country estate.
Chapter 5: Building the Coop Empire
Just outside, tools in hand, my significant other and I crafted palatial accommodations. It required creativity, patience, monetization of caffeine, and our best impression of Bob The Builder, minus the hard hat.
Wooden planks splintered but contributed to notable character (and also several impressive glute flexes). We measured twice. Cut once. Measured again—forever questioning angles and geometries learned in ninth grade.
The chickens inspected our progress critically, with executive oversight from Chief Cackler, Henrietta. Seems chickens take project managing seriously, leaving me envisioning tiny hard hats imminently emerging.
As we nailed, hammered, and balanced (mostly by accident), one thing clear: future “home tour” nights are sure to be fabulous.
Conclusion: Reflecting on Feathery Futures
At the end of this eccentric day, our hearts and the coop were full. Birds peacefully moved into their new abode, Butler Jeeves regained his dignity—after a brief sabbatical—and the coffee was, once again, satisfactorily consumed.
Our home was cleaner, our spirits lighter, and the habits tracked (coffee-imbued righteousness intact). Successful tidying afternoons transform the home; robot vacuums restore sanity (mostly); and chickens—well, they add flavor, fervor, and fun.
Living with flair and laughter makes the mundane parts of life remarkable adventures. So remember: every cluttered counter hides a comic tale, every vacuum rebellion a learning curve, and every sip of morning coffee, a joyous leap toward habit-driven triumphs!
Until our next adventure—keep laughing, cleaning, and creatively coop-building for a brighter tomorrow!
Which, conveniently, begins in this next section of today’s post!
*sigh*
🐔 I Cleaned My Chickens’ House… and Lost Control of My Life
Hi. Hello. It’s me. The girl with a dream… and a chicken dojo full of poop.
This post was supposed to be a motivational “Clean With Me” moment—a chance to declutter, reflect, and romanticize scrubbing barn doors with cute music in the background. But my chickens had other plans.
Grab your gloves (and maybe a glass of mojo juice – whatever that might be for you), because we’re diving deep into the feather-filled, judgment-heavy, slightly-traumatizing-but-mostly-hilarious adventure of cleaning the Chicken Office Dojo House… and the wild year that led to this moment.
💩 Ch 1: The Chicken Office Dojo—Yes, It’s Real
Let me paint a picture.
Once upon a time, there was a woman who just wanted fresh eggs and a quirky hobby. Enter: chickens. Not just any chickens—six sassy, fluffy, alarmingly intelligent hens who now run an establishment we lovingly refer to as The Chicken Office Dojo House.
Why “office dojo,” you ask?
Because part of it used to be my creative studio, then it became a zen garden for poultry, and now…
it’s a coop/boardroom/martial arts dojo hybrid. With motivational posters. And a rogue typewriter.
Chickens are surprisingly entrepreneurial.
🧼 Chapter Two: Cleaning Day—The Poopening
You ever walk into a place and immediately get hit with a smell that just screams, “Regret?”
Yeah. That was me.
I opened the door to the dojo and was met with the kind of silence you only hear right before a horror movie villain pops out. The chickens were too quiet. Suspiciously innocent. Like they knew what they had done… and were proud of it.
What followed was a four-hour montage of:
- Scraping mysterious brown crust off walls
- Power-washing the “zen” out of the meditation corner
- Negotiating with a hen who refused to vacate her nesting box (she won)
- Googling “how to erase the smell of chicken doom from wood”
All while being judged by six feathery faces like I was late for a quarterly coop performance review.
📼 Chapt 3: Flashbacks from a Year with Chickens
As I shoveled, scrubbed, and cried just a little bit, I couldn’t help but reflect on the absurd, joyful chaos that has been the last year of chicken ownership.
🐥 The First Egg:
You’d think we found gold. There were tears. There was cheering. There was an awkward attempt at a TikTok dance. The chicken who laid it looked unimpressed, like, “You’re welcome. Bow down.”
👑 Chicken Politics:
Turns out chickens have a hierarchy—and they take it very seriously. Watching them decide who gets the best perch is like watching Survivor: Featherville Edition. Alliances form. Betrayals happen. One hen staged a coup using intimidation and sheer fluff volume.
😬 Escape Artists:
At one point, three chickens learned how to unlock the coop door. They planned a breakout. I came outside to find them strutting down the driveway like they were on a girls’ trip to Target. They came back. Eventually. For snacks.
💻 Co-Workers with Wings:
One of my hens developed a habit of sitting on my keyboard while I work. I’m convinced she’s trying to ghostwrite a memoir. Either that or send encrypted messages to other coops.
😵💫 Chapter Four: Mid-Cleaning Crisis
Let’s talk about the emotional rollercoaster that is deep-cleaning a chicken house.
Hour 1:
I was optimistic. Pumped. Had a playlist going. “I’m gonna Marie Kondo this coop!” I said.
Hour 2:
Somewhere between hosing down poop planks and finding a dried worm in a nesting corner, the sparkle started to fade. My eyes glazed over. The chickens were laughing at me. Probably. I could feel it.
Hour 3:
Existential crisis. Why do chickens live better than me?
Why does this coop have better feng shui than my kitchen? Why is there glitter in here? When did that happen?
Hour 4:
Acceptance. My hair was full of straw. I smelled like barn dreams deferred. But you know what? The place looked great. And I was lowkey proud of myself. Until one chicken pooped on my freshly cleaned perch.
Maybe I can teach her to clean with me?
📸 Chapter Five: Chicken Yearbook Moments
In honor of surviving this cleaning extravaganza, here are some highlights from the past year that deserve yearbook-style superlatives.
- Most Likely to Escape the Coop: Henrietta the Houdini
- Best Attitude While Laying an Egg: Cluck Norris (seriously, no drama, just business)
- Fluffiest with the Mostest: Miss Bawkarella—she serves main character energy daily.
- Most Likely to Start a Cult: Becky with the Good Beak—she just has… vibes.
- The Intern (aka the baby we added later): still learning, still confused, still adorable.
🧠 Chapter Six: Things I’ve Learned from My Chickens
Aside from the fact that I now know 43 ways to clean chicken poop, this year has been a crash course in unexpected life lessons.
- Don’t rush the process. Eggs take time. So do dreams. And cleaning… a lot of cleaning.
- Chickens don’t care what you look like. But they will peck at your sparkly nail polish.
- You can find joy in the ridiculous. Chickens doing the cha-cha mid-dust bath? Joy.
- You’re more resilient than you think. Especially when poop is involved.
- Sometimes you’re the boss… sometimes the chickens are. Usually the latter.
🎬 Chapter Seven: Final Thoughts (and Chicken Drama Teasers)
Cleaning the Chicken Office Dojo House was supposed to be a simple task. What it turned into was a journey through memories, mayhem, and mild trauma via feather.
Would I do it again?
…Yes. Because even when they poop on your keyboard and judge your outfit from the perch, chickens have a weird way of making your life a whole lot brighter. And louder. And messier.
But mostly, brighter.
🛠️ Bonus Section: Coop Cleaning Essentials (So You Don’t Suffer Like Me)
If you’re thinking of diving into the backyard chicken life (or you’re already deep in it), here are a few must-haves that saved my sanity during the Cleanening:
- Heavy-Duty Gloves – because no one wants that under their nails
- Pet-Safe Cleaner – no bleach, just vibes (and safety)
- Scraper & Wire Brush Combo – for when things get real
- Flooring you can hose down – if it’s absorbent, it’s a trap
- Chicken Cam – optional, but 100% worth it for drama reruns
🐓 Want More Chicken Chaos?
If you made it this far, you’re either:
- A fellow chicken wrangler
- Emotionally invested in my poultry
- Too polite to click away
Whichever camp you fall into—thank you. And if you want more behind-the-scenes coop life, product recs (yes, my chickens have favorites), or you’re just here for the laughs and random feather facts…
👉 Don’t forget to check out the full YouTube video above where you can watch the actual cleaning unfold in all its chaotic glory.
Spoiler: I try to vacuum feathers. It doesn’t end well.
Until next time, may your coops be clean, your eggs be fresh, and your chickens be only mildly judgmental. 🐣💕
Welcome to the most egg-cellent “Clean With Me” you’ll ever watch—CHICKEN EDITION! 🧹🐓✨
This isn’t your average cleaning vlog. Today, we’re deep-cleaning the Chicken Office Dojo House (yes, it’s a thing), reflecting on the hilarity of a whole year with our feathery little roommates. From chicken zoomies to questionable pecking orders and one suspiciously smart hen who thinks she runs the place… this video’s got it all.
🔹 Get ready for:
✔️ Chicken poop scrubbing (so glam)
✔️ Coop decluttering (Marie Kondo would be proud)
✔️ Chicken cam flashbacks!
✔️ Feathered chaos
✔️ And me questioning all my life choices (lovingly)
Whether you’re a fellow backyard chicken wrangler, cleaning enthusiast, or just here for the chicken comedy, you’ll get a good laugh (and maybe some cleaning motivation too? maybe?).
📦 Cluck that subscribe button.
📸 Follow for more behind-the-beaks content.
🐣 And remember: the chicken dojo is sacred… until someone poops on the keyboard.
#CleanWithMe #BackyardChickens #ChickenLife #CoopGoals #ChickenDojoChronicles #FunnyVlog #CleanTokMeetsFarmTok
