humor, self-help

…3 days ’til Christmas


Last night I had such a blast for my birthday. Food. Wine. Family. Friends. And a good tumble down some stairs at the movie theatre… I couldn’t have pictured a better time!

Wait. What did you say?

I had a blast? No. After that.

I couldn’t have pictured  better time? Nope. Before that.

Oh, I the part where I fell down a flight a stairs?

*sigh. Yes.. that. 

Oh yeah, well, let me start there then. After a great dinner, we went to the theatre for a Photo Dec 21, 9 34 45 PM.jpgdose of Pitch Perfect 3 (it was so great by the way, MUCH better than the second one). Obviously, if you’re into singing and music, you’ll be more entertained. We were fairly giddy from that birthday holiday “cheer” and after a two-hour movie, I think my butt fell asleep. As we waited for everyone to bum-rush the exit doors – I always wait for the theatre to clear before I leave a cineplex – we were heckling over the “best” parts of the film. There were really so many, I loved it!

Finally, the other movie goers have vroomed themselves out the door – you’d think they were escaping a flash flooding – and we proceed to make our way to the stairs.

We couldn’t have sat nearer to the screen. Ohhhh… noooo…!

We sat approximately two-thirds (2/3) of the way toward the back. Up past the third (3rd-1/3) flight of stairs. Ugh, fractions. I know. We were also about six seats into the middle half. (1/2) I have barely figured out how to add the baby notches in between the bigger slashes on a gas tank. *slaps foreheadkid-notebook-computer-learns-159533


One-eighth of a tank times four equals a full tank of gas…. Nope. just half. 

Dammit. Don’t quit your day job… 

Anyhoo, so I skip onto my second step. And as I do so, I am suddenly watching the railing as I pass it, quickly. Oh Lord. 

My handbag; as it flies above my head. There it goes.

And as it turns out… My flawless finish puts me face down staring at the very well lit stairs of the movie theatre staircase.


Yeah, I thought I stuck that landing too!

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