humor, relationships, Uncategorized

Christmas Desk-Tree Tussle

I LOVE Christmas!

Every year we put up our tree the weekend after the Gobble Gobble has made it’s visit. If you catch me on a hyper-excited year, I’ll start blasting iTunes with my entire holiday library before Halloween. Yes, I’m that nuts about Christmas. Oh geez. And while my entire library of holiday songs consists of a plethora of artists, spanning generations, I typically only play Mariah Carey, Christina Aguilera, and yeah, my own seasonal ditties that have been recorded for the world to hear. Shameless plug coming…. Yes. But hey! I’m a fan of only the best singers on planet earth. Wow. That’s right… lacking ZERO confidence here. Slow down on the eggnog, sister girl. 

Download Christmastime on iTunes here

Mark Your Calendars, folks: My birthday is also four days before Rudolph’s big ride. Whoa. No crying. This was never a bad thing for me. I always LOVED that! I buy my annual Godiva Big Box -my fav!- and fill it with the Peppermint Truffles, totally my fave, and I shop during the best sales events of the year… it’s all roses, baby.  And yes, MY FAV!!  Red, preferably. When I was a kid, sure, I had to share my birthday cakes with plastic reindeer and sleigh bells on top of the icing; but, they made great additions to my Barbie doll village afterward. Which, notably every doll I ever had taken a visit to Rita’s Pretend Barber Shop and ended up with the chopped haircut special. You cut all your dolls’ hair?


Uh… More on that in another post. How did you even get kid scissors to cut plastic hair for that task? No more questions… and don’t ask my sister about it either, she still hasn’t forgiven me for the porcelain doll incident.

And anyway, I thought we were talking about cake.  I’m never one to complain about cake. Or gingerbread houses full of candy with a few candles on them. Dual purpose sugar rush!

Which brings me to this holiday season. There is an neapolitan swirled ice cream cone of personal transition going on with me this holiday. Don’t get sappy. I won’t. Pay attention. And for some reason, this brought back a pretty funny memory of the year my son and I were first on our own when he was two years old. I knew it… sap. Hush. I was staying with friends and I didn’t have any money for a real tree or anything and at two years old, baby’s not noticing anyway; but, it had been such a rough few months that when my toddler peeped out this new table-sized Christmas tree with small, decorations and lights  my son took one look at that tiny conifer and started bawling.IMG_0870

And bawling.

And bawling some more.

And, oh… My. Lord. Still bawling.

I swear this kid wouldn’t stop crying for hours. I couldn’t locate the problem. He was crying so long that I wound up crying! Strong female role model moment there. Sarcasm. 1) I turned the lights of the tree off and on. Nope. 2) I put his presents in front of him. Nada. 3) I was like trying to tell the little adorable ball of tears, “hey, shit happens, it’s just me and you kid. Let’s move on with it.” Didn’t help, did it. Nope. Not a chance. 4) In hindsight, that pep talk may have been more for me. Because of my crying. *shrugs

So nothing worked.

5) I finally grabbed the tree and stuffed it in the closet. And he stopped crying.

Photo: Pinterest

What a minute… It was the tree? Not just any tree. It was the damn Bonsai-Christmas tree?!

Here I was, a crazy lady, rearranging furniture, throwing feathers around the room, and the whole time it was the freaking shrubbery!

He not only stopped crying.. He started smiling. He was my little baby monkey, sweetheart. The next year, I was back on my feet, bought a full-sized tree and he was all giggles. To this day, I haven’t bought one short stack Tannenbaum and have since refused to by a stunted bush because of that year. Which brings me to this year. My kid is almost all grown up, not really into the whole “Santa” thing anymore – even though, I have threatened him that – if he tells me he doesn’t believe, he will get COAL IN HIS STOCKING. He’s never tested it. And YES, my mother told me the VERY same thing, so yes, I still believe in Ol’ St. Nick because you NEVER know when he’s watching. Plus, my mother is NOT of the “bluffing” persuasion. I’m not going to test her.

pexels-photo-260485.jpegMoral of the story? Don’t buy evil desk trees? No. Throw timber in closets? No.

Stick to the basics.

Enjoy just being with those who love you and love being with you.

My son doesn’t even remember that random year because he was so little; but what has transcended from that small moment in time was keeping things simple and being together with all our little family traditions. Like Christmas tree tossing… Hush. No.

Our Santa would bring his favorite books every year. Sure, he’d get legos and other toys and whatnot; but, books were an important part of that Christmas morning craziness. Why? Because it meant that we could spend each nigh reading stories and using his imagination as he grew up into the amazing young man he was meant to be. He will be well read, well rounded, and cherish those story times at bedtime when I used to read to him, and as he got older, we’d just sit and read together. Which we actually still do. And yeah today’s post ended up with a little sentiment. Dammit. I knew it it! But sometimes, you’re reminded to cherish the most important things in your life. Where the magic REALLY is.

The people in it….

What traditions do you have every year?

Check out my author’s picks for this December Book Haul/Holiday Edition.

Oh… and

P.S. Dear Santa, I still believe in you because my mom told me so and with that, I would like some new tank tops this year. That maybe have glitter on them. Or not. Either way, Thanks! And as always, you’re more than welcome to opt-in on my birthday presents too, since its so close to your delivery date. I’ll leave some carrots for the reindeer; but this time, please bring a pooper scooper. I love you, Rita

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