humor, Uncategorized

Poltergeist of Clutter

Delirious
Delirious

What the hell was I thinking? I mean… it started as a good plan! It wasn’t. But, maybe, it wasn’t so great a plan after all. Nope. It wasn’t. Well… only now that I’m without my “My Crazy Ex” episodes. I guess I need to find something to freaking do. Sigh. Dammit. Ok, so the life sucking damage is done and now it’s time to spread my wings. And fly!  No more television to cozy up with on the couch. I already miss that. That’s not flight in the least. No more DVRing episodes of Mike & Molly. Nope. Nor is it flying. Now there’s nothing left to do except start tearing through the house. And fly? Maybe I’ll find an acorn. Buzz. Buzz.

Still… delirious
Still… delirious

Huh? I don’t know. Let’s see…Wrestle with the tackle box of makeup? No. Panic attack coming on. There’s a lot of makeup in that box. A LOT. Springtime is the best season to sift through the pressed powder spirit world and ditch those dust-collecting shimmers and shadowsticks. The mere thought of this task though frightens me. Oh, because of ghosts? No. Stop it. It’s time to purge the poltergeist of clutter. Who knows what I am going to find amongst the closet of bronzers. Where all old fake eyelashes and unused lipliners lurk. Boo!

IMG_9667How about taking on a project? Oh no. Turn a leftover beer containment, into some kind of pencil organizer for my office. Really? Or a flower box. No. Oh geez, here she goes… Fake flowers though. I’m not good at keeping potted plants, uh, breathing. I’m more of a “cut the stems and place them back in the vase,” kind of girl. Oh, don’t get me wrong, I have plants in my house. Beautiful, lively… and with dust on them. Oh, there’s a thought. Maybe I should dust.

The Flower Box pondering pose
The Flower Box ponder

I circle back to my point. There was a point? Find some excitement. Lame point. Take on a new adventure! Oh, ok, gotcha. Like go to an amusement park. Fill my time… with, uh, I don’t know something. Hmmmm…. I could finish that file box, reorganization project. I cringe. I did start that a few months ago. So dull a project, the project itself got bored. And, while yes, there are a plethora of papers all over the floor -spanning across the ENTIRE floor- I find that there WAS progress on that. Emphasis on “was.”  At one point. No lady… still at the “was” stage. No progress. No movement. Just a clusterfuckery of parchment. Everywhere.  Right. Well, good luck with that!

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