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Turkey Joe Tiara

First of all, I love dressing up. Garçon! Tiara! Chop chop! Secondly, I love meeting new people and talking about other people that they find amusing to watch. Yes, she really did wear that… Poor thing. Or criticize. Come on girls, be nice… Maybe she doesn’t own a full length mirror. No, I was right the first time… Make fun of. Oh, that is not a real friend to you dollface… Lettin you leave the house like that. Hm. HM. Hmmm… Back to the party, First thing we did was bee line to the bar… You’ve got to. Party time! There is no way to get through this kind of Christmas party without the help of alcohol. Shots! Shots! Come on, Isn’t that true for all christmas soirees? Especially when I was waiting on the arrival of the trashy mean girl that everyone had been telling me about. After noticing the dinner service has no where near begun on time, I survey the area and notice there are turkey joe sliders (maybe not turkey, just a hopeful guess) roaming around on trays throughout the ballroom. Oooo yum. But these waiters get about halfway through the grand hall… And never make it to our side of the room. Bastards. I need a plan. I could toss a dessert spoon on the floor. They’ll trip and fall and I’ll save the day by catching the saucer of succulent gobble gobbles. I was at my perch, eyeballing every server in hopes of tackling their plates for a couple of those little buggers. That’s right, no shame here. I’ll tackle that sampler platter in my pencil skirt. 

We left our table to take some adorable pics in costume… What.. Costume pics like prom? Awesome. And I’m not being sarcastic. I know, rarity. Still didn’t see the unpleasant lass everyone’s loathed about. But I was busy pretending to be a jersey muchacha, gum smacking, tiara wearing princess …and that was way more vital to my existence anyway. Feather boas. Glitter. High heels. You’ll never get me away from this green screen, snapshot bonanza. Long story short, I never did meet the trashy mean girl. Yes you did. Wait. I did? Hmph… Don’t remember. Guess the sloppy turkey sliders wrestling event and champagne trumped my interest… Or the tiara. It was definitely the tiara.

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