I used to wonder what a guy’s face looked like during sex. Lying. I actually still do. Some guys. OK. Not every guy because that’s just being a slut. Frankly, who wants to see that one, ugly guy’s “OH” anyway? I don’t. But that hot guy with the six-pack Abs… Ouchie-wa-wa! I would like to know! It’s hot in here. Back to the point. I don’t need to wonder because I think I’ve figured out that some of the everyday things these gloriously sloppy creatures do on the regular can actually be compared to their own personalized “OH” face. And I’ve come up with some personality tall tales to sort of help us girls decode these deviant monsters as well… But I’ll save that for another post.
The Tenderoni
This guy is holding babies and puppies. He talks in a baby voice, creepy. And, talks to dogs in a high pitch, also creepy. He’s going to raise his eyebrows and sweet talk you during the deed. Still creepy. He’ll be gentle, but most likely, too gentle. Sorry, this guy sounds romantic, but he’ll miss the punch you need to have that spark. His OH face most likely looks like he’s going to cry. Oh please don’t. Creepy.
The Wild One
The guy that jumps off roofs and is excited by ham. His mouth is always open, he’s loud and he has the attention span of a flea. So, imagine a roll in the hay with this one and you’re most likely going to see the OH look like a surprised cartoon-like caricature. OR you know those women who have too much plastic surgery? Constantly wearing a look of surprise? Yep like that. He will look like he’s about to catch a mouthful of flies when he’s about to get his. On the up side, at least he’ll throw you around the room and whether he’s enjoying it or not, you’ll never know because he’ll have a look of constant wonder on his face. Eh, I’ll take this one. He’ll be amusing to watch.